How to Lead People Away From God

To work up the courage to write this post took a lot of time for me. It took a lot of prayer and a lot of faith that I would be led to say the right things. Self admittedly, I do not think I am the best person to write this. I do not know or understand the whole Bible. I have not grown up in a church atmosphere and have not went to seminary college. I say the wrong things all the time and a lot of times what I say gets chastised by the people who have a love for God.

Instead of worry about how incapable I was, I prayed about God leading me. I felt like this needed to be said and a lot of people are being led away from God by the people of God. The answer I got when I prayed was why not you? Do you love God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind? Yes. Do you love people and wish for them to turn to God? Yes. Then that is what matters. If my past and my experiences could help somebody find God then what is stopping me? When I looked at the answer to that, it is other Christians were stopping me. I do not want to be seen differently by my friends that also love God. I do not want to be seen differently by my church which is becoming my safe haven, my family. Most importantly I do not want to be seen differently by my family.

When looking into that I decided writing this post was the best thing to do. If people see me differently but it leads somebody to God or helps another person lead someone to God, then its worth it. I have made a lot of mistakes in my life and the fact that I was not born and raised in a church environment helps me relate to others that were not raised in that environment. I also have a lot of empathy for other people. If someone would ask me my spiritual gift, I guess my empathy would be it. When a person cries, I cry. I have to work very hard not to cry when someone else is. Even if I didn't know them, especially if I didn't know them. I feel all the sadness, anger, and love that others feel. I relate to others quite quickly and I feel emotions quite deeply. I try to understand the why and the emotion behind their actions. A lot of times my moods contour to those around me.

Let me tell you a little bit about me. I grew up with my mom saying that many churches were a cult. She believes in God but had had horrible church experiences that led her away from knowing him. One time when I was in preschool my mom was trying to get me into a church so I could learn about the Bible and God. She thought it was a good idea to attend a service at that church. So, she walks in and was immediately stopped and told to go home and change. They made her feel horrible just by the way she was dressed. My mother was not in rags walking into the church, she was not in hooker clothing walking into the church, she was wearing decent clothes. That church made her feel worthless just by walking in to it not in a Sunday dress. From then on we didn't really talk about God. I didn't know much about the Bible and we didn't go to church. I attended different churches by myself growing up because I have always felt the love and I knew I needed God, but always felt out of place.

The people of God turned my mother away from God. When my mother was turned away from God it had an impact on the way I grew up. I made a lot of mistakes growing up. I have done a lot of sins. I will self admit that have not been a perfect person. I was looking for love in all the wrong places and doing the wrong things to get that love. I saw my dad once a year growing up so when I got male attention, I loved it. I wanted to be loved and needed by a male figure and that led me to all the wrong choices. When I met people of God I couldn't really let them get to know my past. Once they did know my past I didn't feel welcome and they made me feel "dirty." I felt that God didn't love me and that his grace wasn't for people like me because of other Christians. I thought that maybe some sins are too much for God to handle. Again the people of God turned me away from God. You only have one chance at a first impression with people and if you make that first impression negative it will lead people away.

That is a little bit about my story. I didn't want to give in all the details but I wanted to share that with you. Knowing the why behind a person's actions and life is very important in knowing the person. Now let me give you 5 ways to lead people away from God, and how you can lead people towards him.

1. Judging Others
You hear about this one a lot. People claim to not judge while they are being extremely judgmental. The Bible talks a lot about judging others and how you should not do that. I came up with an example on judgement and the way it would lead people away. Lets say someone comes up to you and asks you about God. If the first things you do is go to the verse in the Bible and point out their sins and how wrong they are, then you are being judgmental. If the only thing a person see's from you is how wrong the world is today and how many people are sinning that negativity doesn't lead people to God. You can disagree with something and not judge it or the people that do it. A lot of time people already know the sins and even the verses so to keep throwing them in their face is a form of judgement. How do you stay true to your convictions and lead people to God? You show them love. You show them respect. You show them grace. You point them to the love and grace of God first and you let God and his words change them. You don't nitpick the Bible. If you tell the truth, you tell the whole truth, and don't do it to condemn anyone.

Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye. Matthew 7: 1-5

2. Being a Hypocrite

I feel like this one happens a lot more than it should. You speak out against some sins the Bible says, but then you go and sin yourself you act like the sins you do is okay. Well it isn't as bad as so and so's sin. At least I didn't murder anyone. You make any and every excuse to why their sins are worse than yours. You talk to people how sex before marriage or being a homosexual is bad, but you have been divorced three times. Get what I am saying? The fact is God hates all sin to the same degree. End of story. So, how do you use this to lead people to God? You be vulnerable. You tell them about your faults and sins wholeheartedly. You don't give excuses and you tell them wholeheartedly how they made you feel. My sins made me feel worse than I already felt. They didn't fix anything in my life. They made me feel dirty and unwanted. Then you tell people that you found grace and forgiveness in God. You give all the glory to Him. When I found God and I knew forgiveness and grace was open to EVERYONE it changed my life around. I felt free in that and I felt like a weight was taken off of my shoulders.

For whoever keeps the whole law but fails in one point has become accountable for all of it. For he who said, “Do not commit adultery,” also said, “Do not murder.” If you do not commit adultery but do murder, you have become a transgressor of the law. James 2: 10-11

3. Not Separating the Sin from the Sinner

A lot of people have a hard time separating the sin from the sinner. We think that since God hates the sins that a person commits (on a daily basis sometimes) that he must just absolutely hate that person. They think that the person is wicked and they don't take time to get to know them. They don't take time to try to understand who that person is because they are so focused on their sins they do not see the person underneath. Everyone has a story to tell to those who will listen. The fact is that God loves that person just as much as he loves you. Here is what you do, you separate the sins from the sinner. You take time to get to know these people and you always show them Gods love. You treat them just as you would any other person. Never show them hate. Never use God or what is written in the Bible to hurt them and beat them down.

To the contrary, “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. Romans 12:20-21

4. Giving up on People

Sometimes as Christians we just give up. We think if we have told a person about God many times and they still are not going to him then we should just stop. Sometimes we harass people and push Jesus on them. We keep on pushing and we try to scare them into loving God. We tell the same friend daily about how good God is but it doesn't seem to make a difference. First of all we should never be harassing anyone. We bring up the good that God has done in our life, we invite them to church, we be there for them. You can never force what you believe on someone else. With that said a lot of times when we don't think someone is listening, they are. It might not show right away and they might not take your words to heart until the day of their death. Just keep on living in the ways of God and show them your fulfilled life.

And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9

5. Letting Anger for Sin Turn Into Hate

This is one of the most important things you can do. I have actually had personal experience in this one and I wanted to share it with you. Anybody knows me, knows I am huge against abortions. I see them as morally wrong and absolutely hate them. Instead of being angry of the sin, I chose to hate the people that commit it. To me every person who had an abortion was a horrible person and deserved horrible things. I wished the worst for them in their life. This runs in with number 3 and I didn't separate the sin from the sinner and the anger from their actions led to hate. It wasn't until a person that was very close to me and I love dearly told me that she had an abortion. She told me that she struggled with it and was afraid to tell me for the longest time because she thought I would hate her and not want to be a part of her life. I don't want anyone to think that my anger and dislike towards sin means I hate them or God hates them. I don't ever want my anger to turn into something hateful. I learned that in everything you say, be loving and gentle. You can completely disagree with something a person does while giving them the choice to do it. You can love a person wholly but be angry with their choices. Do not let anger over things turn to hate. Hatred only leads to more hatred. The only thing that stops hatred is love. 

Whoever says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness. John 2:9

If you have God in your heart the most important thing you can be doing while still on this world is lead people to him. That is what I think our true purpose is in this life. It is not easy and it gets really frustrating. People that already believe in God and those that are not believers will make things really hard for you. Keep on pushing and keep on fighting. Be respectful and loving in all things that you do. Remember the path of Jesus is the only way to salvation, but some people's paths are a little bit bumpier than yours.

Peace and Love, 

I'm not Ashamed of my Faith, and you Shouldn't be Either

Yesterday night our church had a Worship Night. This is the second one that I have been to and it always pumps me up! It makes me focus on why I believe and what I believe in a world where there are so many that don't think like I do.

Faith to me is more than just believing in something. It is a feeling you have. Faith is something that fills you from the inside out and changes your life. It changes the way you do things and think. It is a whole body process. It makes you want to be a better person and live a more fulfilled life. It gives you a purpose.

I feel very strongly about my faith but that hasn't always been the case. I have faltered and had times where it was really hard for me to keep on believing in God. I will be honest when I said that most of those times that I have faltered was because of people who were Christians. The people who were supposed to lead more people to God almost led me away from him.

 Also my own personal thinking had made me falter. I love science so it was hard to believe in a world of science. It is okay to do research. God wants us to think and be wise. James 1:2-4 states " Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing." Knowing that when my faith is tested that it makes it stronger helped a lot. When I had questions, God led me to people that would help me.

I am a sinner. I will be the first to say that. I have done things that I am not proud of. I have been a person that did awful things and hurt people because I was hurt. I didn't save myself for marriage and had a child out of wedlock. I have had completely un-pure thoughts. I have wanted bad things to happen to those who have hurt me. I did not show love or forgiveness freely. I held on to things and it made me bitter.

I am saying that because I know that everyone has done things that were not by God. Sin is not exclusionary, in includes everyone. When you go into a church and they treat you like some sort of disease then your faith is really hard to hold on to. I get it. If these people are from God, then why are they not acting of God. Jesus spent time with thieves, prostitutes, and other unsavory people and showed them love, not hate. That is the type of Christians we need to be.

I am not ashamed to love God. Even if his people are not perfect. I am not ashamed to believe in something more than me. Even in my sin, God had shown me grace. He gave me a beautiful and smart little girl that means the world to me. If God can use people like David who not only got another man's wife pregnant but had that man killed, then he can use me. He can use you too.

Never be ashamed of what you believe in. If you don't believe in God, I know that doesn't mean your are a bad person. If you do believe, I know you are not naive or stupid. We all have a right to believe in what we chose for whatever reason we choose. Don't be ashamed in that. Keep searching and open yourself to everything this world has to offer. The most important thing we can do as people (not just Christian vs non-believer) is love one another. Show compassion and help as many people as possible.

Faith is very important to me. It forms who I am and who I want to be. It makes me more kind, more forgiving, and more loving. Even in my times of doubt I have always turned back to it. If you could see a timeline of my life you would be able to tell the times where I have had doubt. It always made me into the person who I knew I wasn't on the inside. God's love changed me and gave me peace in a world of darkness. It slowly filled up that pit I was in and turned it into something beautiful.

I love God. I will continue to love him for all eternity. I will keep on striving to be someone who would make him proud. I am not ashamed of my faith, and you shouldn't be either.

Peace and Love,

Why I give, even if I am being taken advantage of

If anyone knows me, they know that I love to give to others. I would give the shirt off of my back if it would help out someone. If I have money on me and it looks like someone needs it (even if I need it) I will give it to them. My husband likes to say "If you could, you would give others every dollar in our banking account." Honestly, I would. I love being able to help those that need it.

The sad thing is in this day and age, you don't know who really needs it. You cant distinguish them between who is just trying to make a quick buck. You see a lot of people recording "homeless" people that at the end of the day hop in their Mercedes. You see a lot of warnings for the GoFundMe and other fundraising sites of you have to really know the person. People see others making money and they want to make some too. There will always be someone that takes advantage of others. Its sad but true.

Today I was on a shopping trip with my kids and two very nice boys came up to me and asked if I would like to support them. They said their band has a chance to earn scholarships for college but they need the funds to be able to make it to the competition. I looked at them and immediately thought, what if they are scamming me? I have hardly ever thought that before but now a days I think that a lot. What if I am being played for a fool and they just take my money and run. Doesn't my family need that money?

I am actually saddened that I thought of that. It is in human nature to be selfish but I have always tried to be the least selfish person I can be. Does that mean I am never selfish? No, I have my moments where I can be very selfish but I try so hard not to be. These questions only took me a second to think about and after I asked myself them, I decided to give him money anyways. I only had $6 but I would gladly give him my "weekly allowance" for them to have a chance to go to college and better themselves. Oh, I should add I have a weekly allowance because my husband and I are trying to pay off debt and we have a very strict budget. Anyways, the fact is even after thinking all of that I gave them what I had.

I hear a lot of people say that they wont give to people who ask for money. I hear a lot of people say that they have heard stories about being ripped off and don't want to give their hard earned money to people who don't actually need it. My thought is this, yeah there are a lot of dishonest people out there. I mean a lot. There are also a lot of good honest people out there that have made bad decisions or have had life just happen to them that actually need the money. For some coming up to you and asking for money is the hardest thing that they would ever do. Just because some take advantage, doesn't mean all will.

Another thought I had is if a person is scamming you, that is on them. That is a problem in their heart. If you decide not to give to someone on the off chance that they may not be honest, well then that is on you. I personally would rather give to someone that maybe scamming me than not to give to someone that really needs it. If that makes sense. I am not dumb about it. I don't carry a lot of money on me so usually when someone asks me to give and  it will be around $5. That is an amount I feel comfortable with and honestly it really isn't a huge deal to my family. That is not a difference between eating and not eating for us.

There is a verse in the Bible that says "for where you treasure is, you heart will be also." To me, this verse says "what you spend your money on says a lot about you." You spend money on what is important to you. A lot of us spend it on just trying to keep up with one another. We have to have the newest things out or the nicest furniture. We have to spend all of our money (and even some we don't have) on keeping up with what the rest of the world has. For me, I want to spend my money on truly making a difference in others lives. I want to give to others because that is where my heart is. I want to teach my children to be charitable and giving. I want to teach them to be selfless and try to help out as many people as possible.

If you make a lot of money, then why wouldn't you spend time helping others. If you have it to give then why wouldn't you help out other people. Most people are just thankful for a couple bucks to help them out. A lot of people will refuse to give to others just because they see them as using it for drugs. If you don't know the person, then who are you to judge? I am not saying you have to give to every sally sob story, but if you have the money why wouldn't you try to help out as many people as possible? In this day and age I see a lot of people that make very good amounts of money and don't help out anyone. They just use it to buy themselves the newest stuff out there so they can show it off or just keep it. They make money the king of their lives. There is another Bible verse that says "What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what shall man a man give in return for his soul?" What good is having all that money, but not using it to make a difference in other peoples lives? I know this verse has a ton of other meanings to it but that is one that I see.

I guess my big point is, don't let other people ruin you. Don't let someone being dishonest and taking advantage of you make it so you wont help out anyone. Yes you might get burned, but you might also really help out someone. I am not saying to go spend hundreds of dollars or not be able to feed your family by helping others, but if you have it then give it. Five dollars might not seem like a lot to you but it could make all the difference in the world to someone else.


Peace and Love,